I found this to be particularly insightful and amusing. Perhaps it’s real - I’m guessing no - but it is funny….

Apparently, a classroom teacher was a bit surprised to get the following picture one of her pupils drew to share with the class:

Needless to say, the teacher was a bit taken back by this image, so she sent a note home with the picture, hoping the next day might provide some clarity:

(Here’s the reply the teacher received the following day)

Dear Mrs. Jones,I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer. I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week before the blizzard hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel we had, and then I found one more in the back room, and that several people were fighting over who would get it. Her picture doesn’t show me dancing around a pole. It’s supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at Home Depot.From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in. Sincerely,Mrs. Smith   

Craigslist is a sociologist’s gold mine…

As I’d posted on Sunday, I found a brownie - half of one, really. I posted my find, complete with an image on craigslist in the lost and found bulletin board, and basically forgot about it. I was being entirely self-indulgent, and self-humoring, and suspected it would go unnoticed for the most part, perhaps occasionally cracking a smile on the unsuspecting, stone-faced surfer…. I fully suspected that the title alone would have been enough to clarify anyone perusing the lost and found that the posting was likely to be satire. The posting is here if you haven’t seen it, or if you just prefer to be lazy, the content of the posting is as follows:

FOUND: One half of a brownie (DTC area) 

I was at work this morning and noticed a brownie was left on the foosball table, and realized immediately that it wasn’t my brownie, as I arrived to work today brownie-less. If this brownie belongs to you, please let me know and I’ll set it aside the next time I get to work for you to pick up from our receptionist. It’s half a brownie, and as far as I can tell without actually eating it, is chocolate.

To my surprise, I actually got a couple of responses…

About half a day after posting it, I received an email response simply stating “You are an idiot.” I can accept that someone might be compelled to anonymously leave the equivalent of a flaming bag of poo on my doorstep/inbox, but this person apparently stewed on my brownie positng, got really mad, and responded a second time, and in a rather acidic fashion. Again, this faceless, unnamed individual clumsily attempted to eviscerate me to the point that my very existence was questioned. Remember: This is as a direct result of a posting about a brownie. A brownie.

I’ve posted their response in its entirety, minus their email address:

You know there are people out there who are looking for a pet or have found a pet who are trying to do the right thing.  How stupid you are to take up space with this crap.  You must have no one that loves you at all. It  is not funny.  You are the reason things like craigs list do not work the way they should. You are an IDIOT! I will report you until they remove your post.  Real People have feelings you jerk. SHUT UP AN MYOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

SOMEBODY needs a self-help book…

Apparently, craigslist isn’t worried about this naysayer, because as of this afternoon, the posting is still there. I guess this “anger ninja” is in the minority.

Another person replied yesterday. This second persons’ response seemed a little more even-tempered.  In fact, “MB” sounds like my kinda people:

Your “Found Brownie” evoked an enlightening chuckle. When owner is found not all is in vain. A quick zap in the microwave will warm and soften it and it should be as good as the first half.  Milk might help too.  May you enjoy more interesting discoveries.  MB from Denver

Lesson for the day: Don’t take yourself - or anyone else for that matter - too seriously.

PEACE.    

The stick was recently inducted into the Toy Hall of Fame.

I didn’t even know there was a toy hall of fame, let alone that an ordinary stick would end up in it. Well, there is, and it’s in The  Strong National Museum of Play.

Chris Bensch is the rather excited fellow in the picture below, holding the stick. He is the museum Curator of Collections. His enthusiasm is understood, when you consider that his job is to collect toys and put them in a museum. What kid wouldn’t want that job??? It reminds me of the movie Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium…

This induction business reminded me of some of my favorite things to play with as a young lad… The trusty rock - for skipping, fer example…..

Other favorites from my childhood that were ordinary objects turned into toys that I nominate for entry into the toy h.o.f……

-The cardboard box, which became the spaceship, race car, secret hideout, and when flattened - the perfect grass sled!!

-lawn furniture - especially the folding lawn chair… When placed on their side, and used in conjunction with other side-situated lawn chairs, one had a house of sorts…

-the cigarette lighter in my dad’s County Squire station wagon. great amusement pushing it in and watching it pop out while waiting for the folks to finish up their shopping…

-A table vice: For holding Estes model rocket engines so they could be hacksawed in half, their contents dumped into an ashtray and…

…Never mind. I did some DUMB things as a kid. Amazing I ever made it outta childhood.  

…Well, of some Jack-o-Lanterns anyway.

 We had a pumpkin carving party Friday night with some of the neighborhood families and their kids. The pumpkins were a product of our gardening efforts, the revelry was a group effort. While the kids enjoyed homemade mini pizzas, the grownups were well plied with my home brews. Pizza, beer and sharp, pointy objects resulted in no trips to the ER, and some really wonderful results, as are displayed in the following pictures:

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!  

…You make sock puppets!!  

  Yessiree, when the dryer decides to unceremoniously cleave in two a pair of socks, and the remaining sock has made numerous return tours of duty through the laundry only to come up empty handed (footed??), you take the remaining “soldier” and dress it up reeeal purdy-like. Then, you take your creation, insert your hand up inside this new “friend” and allow your imagination to run amok. My daughter Gillian, a.k.a. “The Cherub,” and one of her neighborhood friends decided that this would be a great use of otherwise (nearly) useless miscreant footwear.  The end result?  Let’s just say to my eye, “she” looks like Joan Rivers, only I suspect that - comparatively - the sock puppet has the distinct advantage of more supple skin…

I am interested in things that are unconventional. It’s their sheer lack of convention that makes them stand out. Circular thinking I know, but you get the point: If you were to see a fish walking down the street, you’d probably find it interesting, and perhaps a bit unnerving as well. Likewise, when I think of an Italian monk, it’s not very likely that I’d generate a mental image of him singing heavy metal. That is, until I encountered Fratello Metallo…  This makes it very easy to conclude that - if you put your mind to it, you can do anything…

I am live. I have a forum within which to express my insights on virtually everything. This could be dangerous… I’m going to ponder the possibilities and begin scribing my thoughts within days, so check back often. In the meantime, have a Coke and a smile. Cheers!